Aside from a 30 minute meeting this afternoon, I had a whole day at work to catch up on things that had been hanging over my head. I felt like I actually had a few minutes to catch my breath, and I started feeling a little relief. Perfect timing to feel relief in one area of my life when another gets more intense. The two people I spoke about in yesterday's blog were so heavy on my heart today. Even typing this tears are coming....their pain is so real to me. My heart is just breaking for them and I have been wishing all day that the pain could just be mine alone...it hurts so much more when someone I care about is hurting than when it's my pain alone. Grieving. That's a good word for it, I think. This gift of empathy God has given to me is a gift....but it's not all about blue skies....there are clouds that come with it too. But that's okay. It helps me love better....and that's why it was given. I love it....and I thank God for it.
So yesterday when I was following my usually-rude-and-negative staff person to the restaurant where she wanted to treat me to lunch....I called my mom and asked her to pray for me because I didn't want to break down and cry at a business lunch. I'm this lady's supervisor, for pete's sake. I told my mom what was going on and why I was so weepy, and she said she and my Aunt Linda were there together and they would both pray for me. That was so sweet. I said thank you and hung up the phone. She called later to check on me and called again today. I got home from work today, opened the mail, and there was a card she and my aunt had made together yesterday. A card of encouragement with a little prayer inside. From Canton to Columbus in a day. Waiting for me when I needed it. When I am faithful to raise others up in prayer and encourage others, God is faithful to keep a steady supply of that coming my way too. That was a nice surprise.
I had a nice evening with my kids, but as it wound down I could feel myself needing to go somewhere and be alone. The grief was getting strong again and I knew I just needed some time to pray and be by myself. I put the kids to bed and, one at a time tucked them in. Usually I ask each one what their prayer request is and I ask them to thank God for a blessing in their life...and then I pray for them. Tonight I just couldn't do it. I tucked Isaac in bed first. I laid there for a minute and then I asked him if he would pray tonight. He is a very sensitive, observant, compassionate child....and so he started out the prayer by asking God to help me. I just laid there in the dark next to him, tears silently running down my cheeks. He finished his prayer and then asked me why I was crying. I told him, in general terms, about the two people that were on my heart. He became very passionate about finding whoever it was that would hurt my friend's daughter...and prayed for my other friend for a good couple of minutes. He hugged me and gave me a kiss and told me it was going to be alright. Wow. I am humbled and in awe of a child whose heart is all wrapped around a great big God....and who just ministered to his momma's heart. Thank you, God, for suprising me tonight.
Tomorrow's a new day.....
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