New Funnies...

I don't know about the rest of you, but I sure could use a laugh...so here we go!

I was in the kitchen in the morning as Isaac came downstairs (in his usual morning attire of a wet pull-up). He whipped off the pull-up right there in the middle of the dining room and in all his nakedness, said at the top of his little lungs, "Pee is OFF the menu!"

I can't remember if I ever described this or not, but my mom started something a long time ago at night with Isaac. She would lay down with him as he was getting ready to go to sleep and whisper in his ear, "God danced the day you were born. Mommy loves you, Maddie loves you, Daddy loves you, Grandma loves you...". And he would fall to sleep each time she did it. He always asks me to do this, affectionately termed "The Whisperer," each night before bed. One night I was whispering away when Maddie came in the room to ask me something and we got sidetracked. Isaac laid with his back to me, not moving a muscle, and I thought he was asleep. Maddie and I finished our conversation and she went to her room. Then I heard this little voice whisper, "Who else loves me?" Awwwww...

Okay, now these next two aren't really funnies...I just can't believe all the stuff Isaac is learning in school and sometimes it shocks me that a preschooler knows some things a kindergartner has to learn once he gets to school. I asked him one morning what he wanted for breakfast, and he said, "Can I have that octagon cereal?" Um...I had to count the sides to see if he knew what he was talking about. He did. Hee hee. Isaac brought home a page where there were pictures and blanks underneath them where the children had to try to spell the name of whatever was in the picture. Isaac spelled and wrote 9 - three and four letter words matching what the pictures were portraying. At the top, his teacher Miss Angie had written GREAT JOB! NO HELP! And he spells in his head, too. He'll tell me, "Mommy, I know how to spell hat. H-A-T." He can read and sounds things out very well. Just amazing.

Maddie was reading a book from school so she could do her homework and write three sentences describing what she read. It was a story about the Chinese culture and the word "prosper" was used quite a bit. After hearing Maddie read out loud and not stumble on any words, I heard her pause. She then attempted to read the sentence in spite of her uncertainty. "Prosper means...suckied." I came over to read as I was laughing because I knew that wasn't a word. She and I both laughed out loud when I read what the word really was....Succeed. LOL

Isaac was singing the Kenny Loggins song Danger Zone that he had heard at his dad's. This is what he sang for the chorus..."Highway to the Dangerous Jones!" Close enough!

Another song being sung by Isaac...Walk This Way by Aerosmith was sung, "Walk This Play!"

Isaac: "If you pull out an eyelash and make a wish, will it come true?" What?!?! Hee hee

Another one that's not really a funny, but very sweet. Isaac has been battling fear that has had such a stronghold on him. We have prayed together to break generational curses and prayed for the angels to come and protect him, prayed over his room, annointed it and him with oil, Kristin even came over and prayed with me. One night while laying in bed, Isaac said, "Mommy, can you annoint me with oil again?" I told him I could, but that I wouldn't be doing it every night...and that God hears our prayers. I taught him some Bible verses to cast off fear, and we have been saying this one together almost every night...and he leads us..."Fear not, for I am with you always." It's so awesome to see your kids follow what you know is right...

I hesitated on putting this one on here, but my mom insisted I do. One morning I was in the bathroom getting ready for work and Isaac, who had just woke up, came in to pee. I noticed after he was done that there was pee all over the seat, so I called him back in to clean it up and asked him to aim better! He said, "But my penis is long and it hurts when I bend it!" I'm going to let you all figure that one out on your own....moving on!

I can't remember what even brought this on, but Isaac was trying to assure me he was tough. "I'm not delicate - I'm tough and strong as a brick!"

We were in the parking lot of Wal-Mart and Maddie said, "Look at all the people everywhere. Fat people and skinny people..." She had barely gotten the words out when I said, "Maddie!" I have always told the kids not to call anyone fat. For some reason, that word has always bothered me. As quickly as I said it, she had already caught herself and knew what I was going to say and started over..."LARGE people..." Cracked me up.

At the same time as the above, we were still in the van at the store and Maddie had seen a lady walking towards the door of Wal-Mart with a Golden Retreiver on a leash. She pointed it out and said, "Is she walking IN???" I explained to her that sometimes blind people need a seeing eye dog and it's okay for them to go in places that dogs wouldn't normally be allowed. She watched and waited and said, "Nope. She's not going in. She's just outside looking around, so she must not be blind." She was dead serious. Man, I laughed so hard!

The three of us were in the van on the way home from somewhere when Isaac said something and Maddie corrected him. He still says things like, "I runned" or "he beed mean to me." There was a short silence and then Maddie said, "Just wait until you get to my school, Isaac - there are a whole lot of people with bad grammar. You'll feel right at home!" Hah!